A little piece of light...

For  over a decade I have had the amazing opportunity to have one of the most fabulous women in the whole world as my best friend. Funny enough, we certainly did not start off as friends; rather, we were archrivals. 

When I was a bright eyed and eager student (please insert sarcasm), my high school had a very small population; 300 students at the very most when I was in grade 9. The reason being, we were to be the third graduating class from this newly formed secondary school that was created to serve the students of "the north" in the school board. This descriptor is ridiculous for so many reasons; one being that the school is 45 minutes from Toronto. However, I digress…

In grade 9 I was a sweet, mostly innocent, very neurotic girl who was very intelligent and very under motivated. I knew I was bright but I really couldn’t care less about academic achievement because I had discovered the glorious world of older boys! That was so much better to focus on than “Le Geographie du Monde” (I was in French Immersion).  Then I entered my English class… 

I remember that I sat in a group of six. At the time, the government was attempting a lame experiment in what they called “destreaming”.  Simply, the perceived academic level of students was mixed in one class. Though this "let’s hold hands and sing Kumbaya to warm the hearts of all the students" approach was delightful in theory, it didn’t last long. In retrospect it may have actually been some sort of provincial Darwinian experiment. The product being students who were willing to eat the weak for breakfast and make themselves feel better as they battled against their genius rivals. This was exactly the environment of my English class, and this fateful English class was where Kari Lyn and I eyed each other from afar and began our battle for supremacy in the pack.  I did not care to be top of my class, but I cared about being better than Kari Lyn. The same was true of her.  The problem was, we were both bright and the competition was stiff.

Now, not to get too far into the Magic Carpet Ride that was my high school career, but with the school being as small as it was, it was easy to know everyone; if not by name, than at least by face.  I was a bit of a social butterfly.  I hung out with almost every group of people really. I don’t remember them as cliques per say, but maybe they were. I had one group of friends I was closest to, but I really can say that I was lucky enough to be able to associate with most people.  When our senior classes came along the classes were very small. I was in class with Kari Lyn almost every period of the day. Then finally, in World Geography the worst happened… Mr. Bradley sat us together. 


We had gotten to know each other better over the years as we were both on Student Council, but there was still a rivalry.  We were there to outdo each other and that’s what we did. Until one day, we decided on a truce. We were both going to give in because by this time the teachers just gave us the same marks to keep us quiet. We realized that we were stronger together than we were apart… look out world!

Over the past years we have had our share of serious ups and downs, but we have always been there for one another.  When Kari Lyn and her husband had their first son I was chosen to be his godmother.  Whenever we have had the world deal us a crappy hand, we have known that the other was just a call away.  Then the worst happened, Kari Lyn’s mom got sick.

Kari Lyn’s mom, Karin, impressed me the moment I met her.  I remember it like yesterday. We were at school for some event hosted by the Student Council and Kari Lyn’s parents were in attendance. Her father walked in at a strapping 6 foot 8 inches following the cutest little thing you could imagine; a women, all of 5 foot tall in a wheelchair, that had a smile that lit up the room.  From that moment, both her parents took me on as their fourth child. They have treated me as such since that day. 

Karin had always been in a wheelchair.  She was born with Spina bifida and had never let it effect the way she looked at life.  She had an intense faith in God and believed that with his help, anything was possible.  The fact that she was in a chair never came into question. She gave birth to three children and took care of all of their needs as she raised them with her husband.  Though she was told at an early age that she would have a short life, she continued her whole life to defy medicine and the limitations that others put upon her.  She was a huge spirit in a little body. 


A little over two years ago she had not been feeing well and in a divine turn of events she and her husband were in a car accident.  The emergency surgery that followed the accident revealed that she had cancer.  To say the least, everyone was devastated. Following mind-blowing surgeries, Karin forced on and fought the disease. To be frank, I don’t think anyone was surprised. There was never a moment I ever saw Karin back down from any form of adversity. This Christmas Karin was feeling in better spirits.  She enjoyed the holiday with her family and shared quality time.  Then her body began to fight back.  After a courageous battle with cancer, her disease and the complications that come with it defeated the woman I considered to be like a second mom. She passed away last Saturday.

There is no amount of writing that could ever adequately express my respect and admiration for Karin. Though I must tell you that my best friend is an absolutely amazing depiction of the values and tenacity that her mother had.  At the risk of sounding cliché and pouring out platitudes, I will say that there is no replacement for any of us on this planet.  Each of us is a unique and divine creation that imprints upon the others we are blessed enough to meet. I am a better person for having known such an extraordinary woman, and it is my responsibility to carry on a piece of her light now that she cannot do it here on earth. I only hope I can do it half as well as she did it!